Social media is a double-edged sword. On one hand, it really is great for keeping in touch with people you otherwise wouldn’t see, but on the other hand it can be entirely toxic and bad for one’s mental health.
It’s sort of an unspoken rule that you should only post the good stuff on social media, never the bad stuff. However, if you do post only good things, you’re just “humble bragging” or making up for a crappy life. If you post bad things, you’re attention-seeking or whining. Truly, social media is a paradox in which no one wins.
We’re all guilty of making at least one social media faux pas at some point in our lives. If you haven’t made one lately, “On This Day” will be sure to remind you of a time that you did (seriously, I’ve yet to have a day where that feature didn’t make me cringe).
Social Media & Relationships
There is one faux pas that can have lasting damage: Airing your relationship’s dirty laundry. You know what I mean, and you probably just thought of someone in particular when you read that sentence, didn’t you? We all know at least one person who jumps on Facebook for every fight, disagreement or squabble with their partner.
Whether you just want to vent, are looking to be proven “right” or are looking for consolation, telling the entirety of Facebook how your partner has wronged you will only cause more problems for you and your relationship.
First and foremost, it sorta makes you look bad. By complaining about your significant other on social media, you’re telling everyone that at best you have no clue how to handle conflict and at worst that you’re willing to do whatever it takes to get attention, including cut the person you’re supposed to love through thick and thin down to size in front of friends, family and strangers alike.
Not only that, but it’s not fair at all to your partner. How would you feel if every time you made a mistake they told every friend, family member or acquaintance they had? Everyone makes mistakes and yelling them out to the world isn’t right and it isn’t helpful.
Every couple has fights and disagreements. For the most part, you will overcome them together and forget all about them. But if you’ve told every person you know every time your significant other has hurt you, they will keep those incidences in their mind and it will forever change how they view your partner. So, after the smoke has cleared and the dust has settled and you’re back to being in love, they will still have a negative image of the person in mind.
I know that it’s tempting to want to vent when something goes wrong in your life. That’s natural. And to talk about it to someone who is close to both of you and understands that you’re just venting is fine, but when you tell someone who doesn’t really know your partner and/or has no clue what your relationship is like, they not only might hold it against you, but they may also just assume that you’re the good guy and your partner is the bad guy.
Not everyone on your friend’s list has your best interests in mind. Some may be waiting for an opportunity to pounce on your problems while others might just want dirt on you and your partner to use against you later on. By airing out your relationship problems in such a public way, you’re putting that dirt directly in their hands.
So, the next time you’re tempted to get on social media to tell everyone all about how your significant other has pissed you off, just don’t. If your goal is to actually get through the argument or fight, don’t talk to anyone but your partner. That’s the only way you’ll solve the problem.
If, however, you must vent to someone else, make sure it’s to someone who you can trust and who will not hold it against either of you in the end.